a wandering woman writes

Monday, March 06, 2006

Maybe you can, but IKEA'nt...

Take this down, please.

I, the wandering woman previously known as Erin, do hereby swear on all the morcilla in Salamanca, that I will never NEVER again buy a piece of furniture that I have to put together myself.

Ever.

If I have to take another corporate job to be able to afford furniture that's already built, as all furniture should be, in my humble opinion...so be it.

I am serious.

OK, almost.

Tour tickets are now available at the Salamanca Office of Tourism for a guided viewing of the Salamanca bookcase that bears a striking resemblance to a certain tower in Pisa. And yet manages to still hold books. Stunning.

And now a special treat: your Spanish phrase of the day. Ready?

Here it is: Nunca jamás
Translation: Never, ever, ever again.

Nunca jamás.

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9 Comments:

  • Grr Ikea--I've been there.

    I love the premise of your blog!

    By Blogger K, at 10:01 PM  

  • This is why men were invented. Well, that, and that other thing. ;)

    Still, I think you can pay extra to have them deliver and put together furniture. I might be wrong, but I thought so. Do you have Neoset in Spain? They definitely put together all the furniture. They will custom create stuff for you too, at reasonable prices.

    By Blogger melusina, at 10:41 PM  

  • When do we see the photo? You can straighten it in Photoshop.
    All that some (dis)assembly required stuff is a pain.

    By Anonymous John, at 10:46 PM  

  • This is why enterprising students here have set up "screwdriver" businesses offering to assemble flat-pack furniture for those whose efforts more often resemble leaning towers, and that only after puzzling for hours over which is the flange A to be inserted into slot B, which type of screw is for which hole, putting bits on upside down, etc. But as it is an official sight in Salamanca, I think you should upload a photo for our edification.

    By Blogger qaminante, at 11:08 PM  

  • Put some interesting lighting on it and call it 'Art'.

    By Blogger hobbes, at 12:56 AM  

  • Hmm, a picture. We'll see. The photo would have to catch how, because the closure in the back didn't fit just right into its preassigned grooves (E, F and 35 on the diagram, if I am not mistaken) we now have several nails of the finest dull grey protuding, proudly, in plain view from the front of said Art. Not to mention the chipped away wood-chip...pressed board, whatever.

    And don't even ask about the desk chair, also build it yourself, that falls over, ever so gracefully, when at least one of the pop-in wheels falls off. But only after I've worked in it long enough to be sure that this time I've got it.

    By Blogger wandering-woman, at 12:03 PM  

  • Ok, but you finally did it after all. I would prefer a picture of the end, where it´s you watching a piece you haven´t seen before.

    By Blogger Nomadita, at 6:36 PM  

  • I am opposite in this regard... I love to put things together. But I hate it when the directions have been sloppily translated into English. When I moved into my apartment, I was putting together a shelf for my bathroom, and my boyfriend came over and wanted to help. Of course, I'm bull-headed and insisted on doing it myself. That, and a combination of the bad English directions, meant that once it was halfway assembled I realized I needed to take it apart and start again.

    Nunca jamas will I trust the crappy directions! But I would love to see your amazing bookcase as well. :)

    By Blogger Angie, at 11:42 PM  

  • Yeh, well, if you pass through Salmanca, Angie, I'll stock up on all the flat pack furniture I could ever need and you can have a party. Directions in perfect castellano. It's the diagrams that throw me. Turned them sideways, upside down, threw them on the floor and hung my head upside down. Nothing.

    By Blogger wandering-woman, at 10:31 PM  

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